Thursday, May 11, 2023

Day 11: Bookworm/To Fill A Yellow House

I am participating in the American Cancer Society’s challenge to write for thirty minutes each day in May. I do a lot of writing and I can meet this challenge. I plan to make a blog entry each day with what I’ve written.

I wanted to participate in memory of loved ones who fought cancer bravely but succumbed:

My brother-in-law Jeff

My sister-in-law Ann

My dear friend Kay

My Uncle Bob

My Uncle John

 

I also wanted to help raise money to support research and a cure for those currently fighting this vicious disease.

My Facebook to the fundraiser is here


 I am a lifelong bookaholic. When we used to live across the street and around the corner from my Grandma, she would pick me up after school. We would spend the afternoons together. At least once a week, we would walk to the end of her street and visit the most impressive place I’d been to in my young life: the library.

 Grandma was a reader. She visited the library to choose more of her grown-up books to read. Those books were big and had no pictures. I dearly wanted to be able to read them, and she promised that someday I would.

The library seemed huge. I hadn’t seen so many bookshelves in one room in any other place. It seemed miraculous to me that one could come in and bring home books to read for free.

 There was a children’s section, and Grandma would let me pick a book to take back to her house. Wow! So many choices! I had to look at as many of them as I could to decide which one I wanted to read most.

I don’t remember how I learned to read. Might it have been from the books borrowed from the library? Many of Dr. Seuss’ books would help a child learn. Could it be from following my Dad’s finger as he read to me? I didn’t know it at the time, but Dad’s reading skills weren’t all that great. He was Deaf, and his reading level lagged behind most hearing adults. It had to do with the education system and the fact he couldn’t hear words clearly.

Regardless of how I learned, I could already read when I began kindergarten.

Sometimes I would go with Grandma when she went grocery shopping. There was a stand filled with Little Golden Books. Grandma collected them and had quite a library of them at her house. They were a wonderful on a rainy day when Grandma was too busy to play a board game. Grandma knew how much I loved the books and so she would ask me to pick one out to add to her library. I felt so proud.

Grandma’s love of reading passed to my mom. Now, Mom was Deaf too.  Her education was even more deprived than Dad’s because her school didn’t allow her to learn sign language at all. Not only that, she had to spend much of her time in lipreading classes. She found them difficult and a frustrating waste of time, so she left school before her graduation. Her written language and reading skills skyrocketed because she loved books too.  We had a bookcase filled with classics and other of Mom’s favorites. She encouraged me to read as many of them as I liked.

 At ten, I tried some of them. I found that I couldn’t understand Moby Dick or Vanity Fair, so I decided to wait a few more years and contented myself with the school library and the Bookmobile. The Bookmobile was an extension of the Enoch Pratt Library. It was a fun way to find books, and I devoured them.

By junior high, I was making my way through all of Mom’s classics: Jane Eyre, Of Human Bondage, Love Is Eternal, Of Human Bondage, The Brothers Karamazov, Gone With The Wind, and I did try Moby Dick again but couldn’t get past the first few pages. There was Ben-Hur, The Robe, The Big Fisherman, and so many others in her collection.

I got my own library card, and it was my prized possession. I loved to take the city bus downtown to the main Enoch Pratt Library. It was enormous. My Grandma’s library was miniscule in comparison. I had a field day in that library: rooms full of fiction, non-fiction, magazines, other reading material and microfiche machines if I needed to look up old newspaper articles. I would have happily spent days and nights there.

Things haven’t changed. When my kids were born, I read to them from the get-go. I would hold the infant and either recite a book from memory (like Goodnight Moon or Hop On Pop) or I’d support them and guide them through a touch-feel book.  They are all readers, all three of them.

Now I pass my love of reading to the students I tutor. If I can inspire them to enjoy reading, I feel I am successful.

I keep a separate journal to record the books I’ve read. The journals go back years. Part of this challenge entry is going into my book journal.

I belong to Good Reads and am taking part in their yearly book reading challenge.

I saw To Fill A Yellow House by Sussie Anie on a display table when I walked into the library to pick up a book I’d requested. I was intrigued by the cover, a young boy stretching up on tiptoe with a thin paintbrush. The rest of the cover was yellow with orange lettering. I read the reviews on the back cover and decided to check it out.

I enjoyed the book although there were some issues that remained unclear to me, and perhaps that was intentional.

Kwasi was the little boy on the cover. When he’s first introduced, he’s seven years old and living in a large house on the outskirts of London. He has a very busy household: parents, two aunts, and many “aunties” that come and go. That was the first puzzle to unravel. Who were all these “aunties?”

Kwasi, a sensitive child, loves to draw. One day on an outing, he sees a quaint little shop and is intrigued by it. He sketches it but is gathered up by his aunties before he can go into it.  His parents and aunties are very protective of him and he’s almost never out of their sight. He’s not allowed out but one day sneaks out and goes back to the shop.

The door is open, but no one is there. The shop is filled with a variety of curious knick-knacks, lamps, fabrics, toys, and furniture.  He sits down behind the till and makes a drawing of everything he sees, filling in the details. A noise scares him and he bolts for the door.

The shopkeeper comes up from the basement but isn’t able to catch Kwasi. The shopkeeper’s name is Rupert. He is still grieving the loss of his wife, Jada. This curiosity shop was their dream. Much of the money they make from the secondhand donations to the shop are made to a charity. The shopkeeper has an addiction to something that is “perfectly legal” and can be brewed into a tea or coffee. Another puzzle.

There is a larger than life presence in the neighborhood: Councilman Obi. He has a son Kwasi’s age, Jericho. Here is another puzzle: is King Obi a good guy or not? He seems to be, but he also seems to be feared by residents in the neighborhood because he’s pushing for progress.

After the introductory chapters, Kwasi ages to about 15. There have been many changes and a few answers to puzzles. His parents are Ghanian immigrants and all the extra “aunties” that come and go seem to be refugees from war-torn places. Kwasi’s father has moved semi-permanently back to Ghana, working on a years-long project.

Kwasi is still helicoptered by his mother and aunties. He is alternately bullied and invited to join Jericho and his gang of friends. They seem to be involved in some nefarious doings which Kwasi wants no part of.

Instead, Kwasi has been secretly visiting Rupert at his shop. Rupert found Kwasi’s drawing left behind, liked it and framed it. When he realizes that his new visitor is the artist, he befriends Kwasi and encourages him.

It’s a tale told sensitively of love, grief, self-acceptance, and friendship. There is more to the story than I’m sharing but I don’t want to give it all away. I liked it very much and would rate it higher except for some of the ambiguous puzzles I haven’t been able to work out completely.

 

Wednesday, May 10, 2023

Day 10: Best Mother's Day Gift

My late first husband, Rich, and I wanted a family. I was 30 years old, and he was 25 when we married so we knew we couldn’t wait a long time to start. I was so regular; I knew right away when I was first pregnant.  We both smoked but after seeing a commercial in which the baby also “smoked” through the placenta, I said: “We quit cold turkey.”

Nicotine withdrawal and hormonal changes are challenging enough but I also had to give up caffeinated coffee. Rich and I suffered together and somehow survived most of the awful cravings. I indulged in one: chocolate.

My obstetrical practice had a midwife, and I wanted her to deliver our baby. Rich totally supported the idea. We had all the usual prenatal visits and midwife Ellen thought my due date would be May 1, 1987. Rich and I took birthing classes, wanting this to be a natural process. We practiced touch relaxation and the different types of breathing.

Meanwhile, I was growing larger. Quitting cigarettes and coffee had led to another addiction: candy.

I always enjoyed walking. Rich and I used to walk together all the time, but he was working long hours now at a market research company. I would get up early and go for a long walk in our neighborhood after he’d gone to work. Still, I felt big and awkward.

Rich told me there was a baby pool at work. People were choosing dates beginning in April and going into May. I thought it amusing until he told me he’d chosen Mother’s Day, May 10th. Oh no, I moaned. I didn’t want to go that long. My due date was May 1, it was the first week of April, and I was already to go NOW.

Our baby had different ideas. We’d had a couple of ultrasounds and Ellen asked if we’d like to know the baby’s sex. We both said NO, we wanted to be surprised. We’d picked out names for either sex.

I was seeing Ellen every week at this point. I was eager to go into labor, but the baby felt just fine floating in my womb. Ellen suggested walking more often, and so I did. I went for long walks twice a day.

On May 9, I started out on my usual walk, stumbled over a crack in the sidewalk and went down. The mail carrier had just pulled up and he totally panicked, running to my side. He wanted to call for an ambulance, and I was trying to calm him. I was OK, I said. He helped me to my feet. I’d ripped my pants at the knees, and I could feel blood trickling down.

The mail carrier insisted on escorting me back to the apartment I shared with Rich. I assured him over and over that I was ok and yes, yes, I would sit down and rest. When he left, I went into the bathroom and washed my scraped knees, put some antibiotics on, and band-aids.

I changed my jeans and headed back out to walk. My route went from our block to the next block of apartments and then into the neighborhood of houses. I was strolling along, enjoying the fresh air and greeting other moms walking their babies in strollers. I was leaving the apartment complex when I heard a shout: “HEY! What are you doing out here?”

It was the concerned mail carrier. He couldn’t believe I was out walking again. I’m OK, I’m fine, I assured him. I’m just trying to encourage labor.

He shook his head, said good luck, and went on his merry way.

The next day, while Rich was at work, my water broke. I called Ellen and she said, “I’m supposed to tell you to get to the hospital but if you’re not having contractions yet, try walking around. But if they don’t start within the hour, you need to come to the hospital.”

I called Rich. I walked and walked and walked some more. Nothing. Rich left work early. It would take him 45 minutes to get home and once he arrived, we headed ff to the hospital. Ellen met us there.

The baby preferred to stay put. I didn’t want to be induced so Rich and I walked the halls for over an hour. Finally, Ellen said she had to have me induced because my water had broken and there was a danger of infection.

This was an outcome we’d feared. We remembered our birthing instructor said the being induced caused immediate strong contractions with little breaks to rest. Most induced mothers needed to have epidurals. That was the last thing I wanted. Rich promised he’d coach me through it all and that he would talk me out of getting an epidural.

The instructor was right: the contractions hit hard and fast, lasting forever. One would stop and I didn’t have much time to breathe before another one hit. It was pretty intense. I was almost fully dilated and asking for an epidural. But Rich was an excellent coach. His face was close to mine, and he was helping me breathe through those painful contractions.

The obstetrician on call periodically checked in on us. There was another patient from the practice at the other end of the hall. The two of us were at about the same stage in labor. Sometimes I could hear the doctor racing up and down the hall to see which of us would deliver first. I heard him consulting with Ellen. He wanted to do a Caesarian.

“No, let’s give her a chance,” Ellen said. Thank God for her presence!

At last, it was time to begin pushing. The doctor was with the other mother, so it was just Ellen, Rich, and me.

And then, our baby was finally ready to be delivered. “It’s a boy!” Ellen exclaimed joyfully.

I was exhausted and thrilled. Rich proudly took our little boy in his arms and sat down with him while I finished delivering the placenta. Before our son was whisked away to the nursery, I had a chance to cuddle him myself.

I had no idea what time it was and learned it was almost 5 a.m., Mother’s Day morning.  Later, I held our son again in my arms and felt blessed. He was the most special Mother’s Day gift.

He still is.


Once again, this is my pledge to write for at least a half hour every day:

I am participating in the American Cancer Society’s challenge to write for thirty minutes each day in May. I do a lot of writing and I can meet this challenge. I plan to make a blog entry each day with what I’ve written.

I wanted to participate in memory of loved ones who fought cancer bravely but succumbed:

My brother-in-law Jeff

My sister-in-law Ann

My dear friend Kay

My Uncle Bob

My Uncle John

 

I also wanted to help raise money to support research and a cure for those currently fighting this vicious disease.

My Facebook to the fundraiser is here.  

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